Knowing what to do and doing what you know are two entirely different things. We can read the books and attend all of the latest seminars but when it is all said and done, it’s not what we know that will bring us success it’s what we do; on autopilot.
Throughout our life we have been creating habits and our habits have created the life we now live. Successful habits work together to create life and poor habits work together to destroy it. Wisdom is not simply knowing this; it is doing whatever it takes to strengthen the successful habits and to destroy the poor ones.
Developing habits take time; breaking old habits and developing new ones may take even longer. We know we should exercise more, eat healthier, quit smoking, develop our financial IQ and learn how to control our anger but we don’t. Geez, why did I just eat 4 donuts? I can’t believe I lost my temper again! I really should learn how to manage my time better…. yada, yada, yada. Can I get an amen?
If you really want to change your habits and create a better life you must accept the fact that you cannot do it on your own and that you need help; after all, if you could have changed yourself, you would have by now right?
Here are a few tips that will help you succeed in breaking bad habits.
1. Give yourself time. It takes 3-4 weeks of doing the same thing over and over again before it becomes a habit. Most people try something once, twice or even six times and then give up. They get on the treadmill 4 times and then it becomes a coat rack. They stop eating poorly for just 6 meals and then give up. You must commit to at least 3-4 weeks of the new behavior before you decide to give up and try something else.
2. You will most likely backslide. Just because you cheat or go back to your old ways once, don’t allow that to be the reason to stay there. Get back on the horse immediately! I meet people that cheat one time and say, “Oh well, I have already blown it, I might as well go all the way” If that is you, SMACK yourself right now! Expect to fall, it is no big deal and it doesn’t mean you failed. Get back on track and keep going!
3. Look ahead. Don’t plan on making sudden changes to your diet just before Thanksgiving or other big dinner party and don’t plan on cutting back on your work hours in the middle of a huge project. The odds of successfully changing certain habits will increase if you plan the best time to make the changes. Note: When it comes to your health and relationships don’t wait. It is better to back out of a dinner engagement than to risk your life with eating poorly and it is more costly to lose a spouse or child than it is to lose a job. Use wisdom in your planning.
4. Seek Help. Remember if you could have done it on your own by now you would have. Find someone who has done what you intend on doing and ask them to help you. Sometimes just knowing and speaking to someone who has succeeded can give you the confidence to succeed yourself.
5. Replace the bad with good. This step is critical for success. You must replace the bad destructive habit with a constructive one or you may just swap one bad habit for another. For example if you want to make a break from the computer at 6:00 every night, grabbing the guitar hero game and jamming instead will most likely not produce a beneficial change. Instead go out for a walk, read a book, play a board game with the kids, visit your neighbors or volunteer at the food pantry or Boys and Girls club. The same rings true for eating. If you snack out after dinner when you watch TV, stop watching TV. Get active doing something else that will keep your hands and mind occupied instead and throw all the chips and cookies out and replace them with healthy food!
6. Find an accountability partner. Do you know why it is so easy for celebrities to get in shape and make so much money? They have people in their life that help them. They have financial advisors that scream at them when they go on spending spree’s, managers that chew them out when they don’t want to work and coaches that wake them up and kick their butt all the way down to the gym. Find someone who will not be manipulated by your sorry excuses for quitting. Someone who will call you up to check on your progress, that will lift you up and encourage you to keep going and yes kick your butt when you want to stop. If you don’t know anyone, hire one! Can’t afford it? Bull, it’s the cable, movies and bonbons you can’t afford. We are talking about your life and the life of your family; you can’t afford not to change!
7. Think Deeper. Most people are only motivated by pain. Unless there is a painful enough reason for you to change, you will most likely stay just the way you are. The pain can come in two ways, either by seeing something so good that it makes your present state look bad or by experiencing the pain yourself. If you don’t have a good enough reason to break that habit, you are not thinking deep enough. Think of all the bad things that will happen if you don’t change. Make a list and write it down so you can see it with your own eyes. What will happen if you don’t get in shape? What will happen if you don’t get your finances under control? What will happen if you don’t learn how to communicate with your spouse? Go deep enough until you experience such a painful thought that it motivates you to change. Can’t think of one? Give me a call, I will help.
8. Think Higher. Imagine your life the way you want it to be; healthy, wealthy and full of joy. Your relationships are solid, the family is tight, you are financially stable and your future is secure. Is it possible? Of course it is. Can you attain it? You are still breathing aren’t you? You are only limited by your thoughts and actions. You have greatness within; it is time to let it out!
Breaking old habits and developing new ones is not easy, but it is worth it!
Today is the first day of the rest of your life; go make it a great one!
Bob
Please forward this to anyone who needs a push in the right direction
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